Poets and Primates

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Elevating bad taste to a whole new level? Possibly. Conversation piece? Definitely. And the conversation might go something like this, “Why do you have three wooden monkeys holding up your glass coffee table?” “Were you microdosing psilocybins the last time you operated The Ebays?” Answers like “they were hand carved in Italy” and “I like their company” won’t put anyone at ease with your living room’s eclectic anchor. You could repeat the seller’s spiel, “the monkeys are beautiful” but that might disconcert your guests even more than the unrelenting dead eyed stare of the three monkeys holding up your coffee table. Yes, you will be alone on this purchase but you can confidently whisper to yourself every night before you drift off on the couch, “these monkeys are mine…”Check it out here!

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And speaking of unsettling stares there’s something really intriguing about this photo-realist portrait that could be titled, “Agro Folk Singer”. It’s his eyes. The way he’s gripping his guitar like a life raft in the middle of the ocean while about to pummel it with his other disproportionately gargantuan paw. He’s the kind of “beat” that stalked and cornered the Village Vanguard’s Manager determined to get on stage and prove his Banker dad in Manhasset that those years at Brown weren’t for naught. But no matter how counter cultural he strove to be our fratty folk hero couldn’t lose the turtleneck, the tweed, and that permanently vertical Matt Damon hairdo. Put his portrait over your mantle or on your study wall and imagine the cribbed Dylan and Seeger songs he would have shout-sung at you…and then picture him now on a stool somewhere in a country club in New Jersey with only a few strands of his magnificent mane left sucking down a gin and tonic and confessing to a disinterested bartender, “I was a folk singer once.” Check it out here!


Written by Joseph Castelo.

Joseph Castelo,  born in Brooklyn, bred in Jersey. His family has been in business in Hoboken for 60 years and Joe can still remember the smell of sawdust on the floor of The Clam Broth House. Joe is an entrepreneur and filmmaker. You can catch his latest film, “The Preppie Connection” on Netflix.